Quitters never win...

...and winners never quit. And we all want to be a winner, don't we?

I don't know where this extreme fear I have of quitting something comes from. It's normal for tastes to change, to decide that you don't really want to do something as much as you originally thought you did, or that unexpected things come up and as much as you'd like to do something it's just not going to happen. However, I seem to be of the never say die category and I feel that I must complete everything I have decided to do or die trying.

Over 10 years ago I set out to read Middlemarch on the recommendation of a college professor. Looking back I'm imagining him chuckling to himself about tricking keen students into reading the most BORING book known to man, but then I didn't know any better. I got about halfway through before I realized that I hadn't really understood much of the last 100 pages and decided to give it up.

The memory stayed with me though, and a Facebook quiz that wanted to know how many of the top 100 books you have read shamed me when I realized I had read only a quarter of them. Of course Middlemarch was on that list.

I had gotten my Ipad at that point and discovered that many of the classics were available free of charge and proceeded to download a whole bunch. First up, Jane Eyre. I surprised myself by heartily enjoying it. Then I decided to tackle the formidable Middlemarch. I helped myself a bit by reading a summary of all the characters, since there are SO MANY. I think that was the problem the first time around; as soon as I would get interested in one person's story, the perspective would change. And then she'd start going on a long tirade about English politics. But I'm really digressing here, aren't I?

I finished Middlemarch, and then decided to go onto A Tale of Two Cities. I was never able to get past "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..." and now I have. But I haven't finished it yet, and part of me keeps wondering why I'm even bothering. Isn't life too short to read boring books? (along that same train of thought, I have a hard time rereading books I've enjoyed because I feel I should be reading these boring books instead).

If I really decide to never say die, I will also have to go back and learn to play the guitar. I wish I could get my Mom to force me to practice like she did when we took piano lessons as children, because it would make learning a new instrument a lot easier. But learning the piano was a lot easier than learning the guitar, and I sucked at the piano, even with all the practicing.

So, is it OK to decide that I don't want to read A Tale of Two Cities because it's giving Middlemarch a run for its money as the most boring book ever written? Is it OK to decide that I really don't want to learn to play the guitar after all because it's too hard? Is it OK to back out of a commitment that I probably could make if I really pushed myself, but I don't feel like pushing myself? And is it OK to wonder who I'm really asking permission from?

"A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read." - Mark Twain